It's hard to believe it's almost February of 2009! I think time flies the older you get. When I was younger, I was convinced I wouldn't make it until I was 16, then until I graduated, then until I married, until children, etc. But here I am, all grown up with 3 kids. I survived.
We found out that Ted could finish school this year, and we're so excited about it! It's been bothering him that he never finished his degree, and now he can finally get it done. But it also means that we're going to be really busy this semester. He'll be taking 14 hours and working full-time, and I'll be with the kids non-stop by myself. I'm sure most people could do it just fine, but I'm a better mom when I get breaks (and lots of help from Ted). My goal is to be as patient and kind as I can for as long as I can. And then I may have to put myself in time-out when the meltdown begins.
This year I have two major goals: lose weight and finish the book. I know everyone always says lose weight, but I usually just say "eat better" or something vague, because then I can feel like I've accomplished my goal, when really I didn't try very hard. Losing weight is more measurable. I've specified a number to myself, so now it's on. Still overwhelming, though.
And the book- I'm plugging away at it, and I'm really happy with where it's going. I'm still in the hard editing stage, but I've been cautiously letting others read what I've gotten so far.
I hope I can be more of my true self this year. Express it better. With words, actions, through art and music, and by encouraging others more often. I will try not to isolate, take more of an active role with things that are important to me, and join some groups- writing groups, exercise groups, mom groups, etc. I want to start living out the "me" I want to be. That sounds deep, but it's true. Like the quote from George Eliot says,
"It is never too late to be what you might have been."